Why does my boyfriend/husband keep cheating on me?
Ummm...because you let him! YES I SAID IT!!! You let him. But how, you may ask?...because the first time that he cheats on you shouldn't even consider that cheating. It should be taken as he broke up with you the moment he did that. I understand that men work differently that women. They are wired differently and yes, they may look at a booty and stare at boobies all they want, but when they actually CHEAT, it goes on to another level. That means that he lost all respect for you, he didn't even consider your feelings when he did it, it means that his mind was set on having intercourse with this other person instead of you, that means that no matter which way you put it, he PUT HIS DI*C into another person when you were both supposed to be in a monogamous relationship.
What should I do now that he cheated?
You should pack up your things and get the hell away from that house/apartment that you both shared. YES, as hard as it may seem, HAVE SOME SELF RESPECT. If you don't have any children, wether you're married or just living together, just follow these steps:
1. Pack up your stuff. LEAVE everything that belonged to him, if he gave you a shirt, leave it, if he gave you a necklace (unless is expensive, which you can pawn) leave it. Get the point? The point is that you should NOT have to stay in a place that you both shared. why? Because if you stay, it will take longer to forget since everything in that house will remind you of him.
1.5. If you do have children, I still advice that you pack up and go to a relative's home. Tell them is temporary and that you just couldn't handle the situation anymore. Let them know what your ex partner did. Your kids are better off with you separated than with a house full of negativity.
2. Don't have too much money to afford an apartment? Um...go on craigslist and crash into a room for less that $150 a week. Doesn't mean that you will be staying there forever, but is a temporary place where you can relax your mind and deal with all the emotions that you're going through...by yourself.
3. Download an application called "MrNumber" or any other call/text blocking application and block his number. TRUST ME! This will work wonders! Even if you know his number by heart, I know you're stronger than calling him or texting him. Everytime that you find yourself about to call him, remember that you have your SELF RESPECT first. If you are ever completely ready, and I mean after it's been months that you have not heard from this person, go into the application and either delete all his messages or read them, is up to you. But in the meantime, while you're hurting, BLOCK HIS ASS from every sort of communication that you can. emails, facebook, instagram, twitter, cell phone, etc. Not only will that lying bastard be wondering how is it that you have not reached out to him, but you will feel empowered that you can control your actions.
4. In the meantime, FORCE YOURSELF to go to the gym. I'm saying to force yourself because I know how hard and devastating it is to lose a relationship that you thought would last forever. You will not want to do anything after that happens and is ok for a day or two, but don't stop your life for someone who didnt even appreciate you. He did not stop his. Give yourself a goal that you want to look as hot as possible. It will be the best revenge, not only for him because he'll be so pissed off at what he did to you but for you, because you will feel better. If you're not a gym person, go to the movies by yourself, go to a restaurant and enjoy your kind of food, go to a museum and learn new things, move counties and meet new neighbors, find a hobby that you know you'll love, volunteer in a good samaritan activity, it will lift up your spirits knowing that you're just trying to relieve a heart break when there are so many other people that just live to get food for the next day.
5. Do something different :) ....dye your hair another color, cut it or put some extensions on. Go to the nail salon and pamper yourself. Search online or go to the store and change the way that you dress. ACT HAPPIER even if you don't feel like it, the muscles in your face will tell your brain that even though you're been through a lot, you are still smiling which must mean that you are happier. Keep those endorphins going!
6. When you're home alone don't overthink the situation. Remember that you thinking about it will not change the outcome of what happened. It will do you no good. Instead, find things to do that will help you FALL OUT OF LOVE. Yes, you can fall out of love. In case you didn't know, love is a process endorse by chemicals in our body. When those chemicals are altered, love is different. How can a person fall out of love? Simple, join a dating site and put your hottest picture as your main pic. Go out with friends and set yourself a goal that you will at least talk to one of the guys there. Read a book or research online ways that you can dissappoint the reality of that "love" that was lost.
To be honest, about 98.9% of you will not do any of these steps because you're simply scared. You're scared that you will never find anyone like that person, you're scared that you will end up alone, you're mad that you invested so much time with this person and now you gotta just walk away. Honey, it happens to all of us. There are couples that are together for 50+ years and they still get a divorce after all that time. Or haven't you read about that 90 year olf couple that recently got a divorce after 60 something years because the husband found out about an affair that his wife had in 1946?...no, well then that should be an inspiration to you because no matter what anyone else says, you are worth much more. You were born alone, you will die alone...or wait, what would happen if you died before him? Do you really think he would stay single for the rest of his life? um no. Men usually last about a year grieving and then is onto the next chick. So value yourself more and I guaranteed that others will value you as well.
0 comments:
Post a Comment